Update

Hi Scarred_Reality! It's been 1010 (wow, that's a big number) days since you joined Xanga... won't you support us by going Premium?

So I decided to come back here and write a bit more, just in a place that not many people know about anymore or ever pay attention too. I'm hoping  Kat will still tune in but its been so long and I can understand that.

I came back to the xanga and looked over all my old emo meaningless poetry that i wrote when i know i thought people cared how I felt. It was so...adolescent. Thats wierd for me to be saying now, because i really am pretty immature for my age i mean i have yet to get my first job. I have yet to have a SERIOUS girlfreind meaning ive done the little teen "hook-up" thing a few too many times and its just getting old. I still have my issue with commitment to anything but I'm realizing more and more that the opporotunities ive been given lately are amazing. Heres a few of them:
-Expert Acting Teacher at The Growing Stage
-Choir...enough said
-Eastbrook Studios discount
-High School Musical auditions coming up..(Chorus here I come!)
-New Mexico Musical Ambassidors (invited me to be in a concert choir that tours EUROPE next summer.)
-Kids Club 07 lead singer/worship leader

I mean thats just a few. My life ISNT as bad as those old poems always made it seem. My feelings arent what define me anymore. Thats just not who I am and thats just not something I want to write about. All of the violence and darkness just seems to have left me. I've discovered talents way beyond the capacity that I ever thought I had. I know I'm an amazing worker with children. I have a stage presence that rivals John Travolta. I'm becoming a better singer every single day, Im a better dancer than I ever thought I was (and for the first time I'm proud of it.) and more importantly...peoples judgements of me dont seem to matter anymore. Embarassment doesnt happen. I mean I can totally see where people are coming from when they call me "weird" or "gay" when they see me on stage. I get it, its a pretty homosexual thing to love to be on stage doing what I do. Peoples judgments will always be there. There's never any getting around it so Ive trained myself not to care. I just do what I do the best I can do it and it makes me happy. Ive changed alot. But Jessica Alba is still the hottest woman alive and ALIAS is still the best show on TV. (too bad it got cancelled) What I want to say is...I'm my own person now. I'm not following the trend that my two best friends set for me way back when we all wore black on the same day...and we had matching black wristbands and passed poems to eachother in class. That part of my life is long, long gone. I'll always cherish it because those where two of the greatest friendships Ive ever had but all of the fakeness that it was wrapped in just seems ridiculous now. Who cares about the razorblades in my bathroom? Theyre for shaving. Not for slicing the throat off of some "zombie of emotional decay" or anything like that.

Life is good. I'm gonna go live it. Keep you posted.
~Peace †

Jonathan.

Hi Scarred_Reality! It's been 468 (wow, that's a big number) days since you joined Xanga... won't you support us by going Premium?

~the answer is still no bitches....woot!

~Scarred.

11 has become to be a very interesting number. It could be a forced
>>coincidence, but in any case this is interesting. You decide for
>>yourself:
>>
>>1) New York City has 11 letters.
>>
>>2) Afghanistan has 11 letters.
>>
>>3) Ramsin Yuseb (The terrorist who threatened the Twin Towers
>>in1993) has
>>11 letters.
>>
>>4) George W. Bush has 11 letters.
>>
>>This could be a mere coincidence... (Could it be?) . Now here is
>>what is
>>interesting...
>>
>>1) New York is the State .. 11
>>
>>2) The first plane crushing against the Twin Towers was flight ..11.
>>
>>3) Flight .. 11 was carrying 92 passengers Adding this number gives
>>9+2=11.
>>
>>4) Flight .. 77 who also hit the
>>towers, was carrying 65 passengers. Adding
>>this: 6+5=11.
>>
>>5) The tragedy was on September 11, or 9/11. Adding this: 9+1+1=11
>>
>>6) The date is equal to the emergency
>>number 911. Adding this: 9+1+1=11
>>
>>Now we have a very upsetting piece..
>>
>>1) The total number of victims inside the planes are 254: 2+5+4=11
>>
>>2) The day September 11 is day number 254 of the calendar year:
>>2+5+4=11
>>
>>3) After September 11, there are 111 days more to the end of the
>>year.
>>
>>4) The tragedy of 3/11/2004 in Madrid also adds to: 3+1+1+2+4=11.
>>
>>5) The tragedy in Madrid happened 911 days after the tragedy of the
>>Twin
>>Towers.
>>
>>Spooky!! Read on.....! This is really eerie . This is something to
>>think
>>about!
>>
>>Since America is typically represented by an Eagle. Saddam and Bin
>>Laden
>>should have read up on their Muslim passages...
>>The
>>following verse is from the Quran, (the Islamic Bible).
>>
>>Quran (9:11) -- For it is written that a son of Arabia would awaken
>>a
>>fearsome Eagle. The wrath of the Eagle would
>>be felt throughout he lands of
>>Allah and lo, while some of the people trembled in despair still
>>more
>>rejoiced; for the wrath of the Eagle cleansed the lands of Allah;
>>and
>>there was peace.
>>
>>Note the verse number!!!!!
>>
>>1. Open up a blank Word document.
>>2. Type in Q33 NY in capitals. (This is the flight number of the
>>1st plane to hit the World Trade Center *gate Q33 @ NY (new york)
>>3. Highlight the Q33 NY
>>4. Change the font size to 48.
>>5. Change the actual font to Wingdings1

~the scariest thing you will ever see...do the 1-5 at the end

~Scarred.

Awsome new pics!

Amazing air! 1 of 3

2 of 3

3 of 3

A freakin insane backflip!

I had some fun at the park a few days ago...got some cool color effects for the pics too...I am going to die way too soon...why not live it on the edge?

~Scarred.